EPISODE 13
Oct 11, 2021
EPISODE 13
Oct 11, 2021
Show Notes
In Episode 2, you’ll find me chatting about the “heart of networking” with Executive Leadership Coach, Group Process Facilitator, Public Speaker, and Author: Marguerite Orane. Once upon a time, Marguerite and I were both what she calls “reluctant networkers” who were inspired to face our fears and get out there by the same woman. Tune in as we talk about our love of networking and a little something called the “connector’s high.”
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Despina Zanganas 0:07
Believe it or not, I used to be absolutely terrified of networking. No way. You. Yeah. I’m the host of connections. A transformative podcast designed for women looking to harness the power of networking, make life-changing connections and improve their personal and professional lives in ways that they could have previously only imagined. Because I truly believe that inside each of us is a social butterfly, just waiting to bloom.
Hello everyone thank you so much for joining me on the connected bloom podcast. My guest today is Marguerite Orane. Let me tell you a little bit about Marguerite.
Marguerite Orane is committed to changing the way we live and work so that we do so with joy. She coaches leaders in realizing the benefits that joy at work bring to people and profits. Her clients value her insights on leadership, strategy and personal growth delivered in her own exuberant, joy-filled way as a speaker, coach and facilitator. Her experience as an entrepreneur, her Harvard MBA, daily practice of mindfulness meditation and her curiosity about the mysteries and delights of the world are the foundation of her work. Wherever you find Marguerite, you will find joy.
Marguerite, thank you so much for joining me today.
Marguerite Orane
Oh, thank you. It’s my joy to be here. It’s great.
Despina Zanganas
So Marguerite, this is a question I asked all of my guests. How did we originally Connect?
Marguerite Orane 1:45
Well, this is we connected through one of the best networkers I know to be use.
And I think it was in what 2014 Number something new and she said, you too will have to be.
And she was right. We didn’t have to be so yeah service connected so it was sort of networking.
Despina Zanganas 2:12
Yeah, for sure and Judy’s actually, she was the first guest on my podcast and she actually mentioned again she’s like you should really interview Marguerite again so that was great, and you actually were a speaker at lean in, can I can’t remember what year it was it was like 2017 or 2018 or something like that and it was all about leadership and kicking off the year and you were definitely one of the favourite speakers that night, so it was so much fun. I had a great time. Yeah. So why don’t we learn a little bit about you, so why don’t you tell me about the business that you do.
Marguerite Orane 2:48
So, the name of my business is free and laughing, Inc. And whenever anybody hears that, like, because my lawyers, it brings a smile to their face, and it’s very reflective of my commitment which is to help leaders live work and live with joy, lead with joy. Now why is it so important to me, first of all, well when I was 23 years old, I read my family’s business in Jamaica, and it was a terrible miserable job, I mean it was just awful. And after that I went to Harvard Business School did my MBA and I Sutter really took the time to reflect on how I wanted to work, and I, and I decided that from then. I was only going to work with joy. I was just going to do things that made me happy. And so that’s what I’ve done for the, for the rest of my career. But then as I’ve served strategy plans, mostly in strategy and in their culture. I realized, hey, you know, there’s really something missing in the workplace since joy. And so, I have, I sort of slowly because I was coming from a place of joy, really got into this very intentional place around joints and you know what, I’m going to be unapologetic about this, I’m coaching your people to be, to be more joyful and to lead from a place of joy, because it is just so much more productive so much more joyful your people are motivated, and you leave work at the end of the day, happy. And so I pulled together all of my life experiences in my coaching of leaders and I offer this to them, and they do become more joyful. And these do start to see the benefit so I’m a coach of senior leaders C suite. And I am also a facilitate I facilitate strategy with choice so my workshops or retreats off sites are fun and laughter. And I also help organizations, design and implement their culture of joy. When I speak, I grew up.
Despina Zanganas 5:29
Yeah, you know what I can totally relate to that because we probably not just me, you know so many of the listeners we’ve been part of organizations that just drained you when you went home, or volunteer opportunities, there’s something like that, you know, it’s just, there’s no joy people just be in their heads down and get to work and I think it’s so important to include that as part of your organization.
Marguerite Orane 5:57
I will tell you a little joke. When I had, I had a consulting facilitation and consulting firm in Jamaica with a partnership and we had about, maybe about 10 employees or so. And we had a problem. People, we were having so much fun, Nobody would leave in the evening.
And so we actually put in. You know we are and I love the balanced scorecard I think it’s a fabulous tool for strategy articulation and management, and we actually put in there, a metric that we put sent. It was something around right number of days when everyone left by five o’clock. We still see it anyway.
Despina Zanganas 6:56
Sounds great. So what do you tell me how networking comes into play in your business.
Marguerite Orane 7:02
Well, God will tell you, I, I turned myself a reluctant, a very reluctant networker, Judy, use my coach has had to drag me kicking and screaming and resisting with all of my mates into networking. But that being said, the sooner I realize I’m pretty good network.
Despina Zanganas 7:32
I don’t think so because you’ve got a huge following. So, it’s so funny that so many people who who don’t see themselves as great Networkers are actually really good I mean I’ve done some coaching obviously
Marguerite Orane 7:45
yeah. So, you know, the the way that I approach networking. As always, fairly fell back Is this okay. But I really approach, I think my fundamental objective around networking is to meet people who I can then connect with my clients to add more value to them. And when I look at it that way. I just find it a lot easier to go out of my way to say to somebody, Hey, I love that article that you wrote, I’m gonna share it with all my clients, it just, it’s the giving part of me and I think that’s a crucial part of networking. Networking is about giving, not getting. If your project is getting, you’re dead in the water. So I view it first and foremost, as a way to add, find ways to add more value to my clients. And then the other way is just to expand my body of knowledge to meet interesting people who have something to share, who are willing and happy to share this I’ma I’m in the knowledge business so I have to be constantly thinking about and getting new knowledge so I find that very interesting. And then of course I’d love to tell you that. Yeah, it’s also about getting leads for new clients. Yes, that’s where we start to go golf and that’s where the reluctance comes in that too and it has worked, that I have gotten clients from it so not knocking it at all.
Despina Zanganas 9:30
But yeah for sure it’s the same for me I’ve gotten to clients but, I mean you were talking about you know giving and sharing articles and stuff like that. There’s. I’ve heard it a few times now it’s almost like this like connectors Hi, you know, so like when you connect to people, and something kind of grows out of that relationship. Yeah, exactly like you. Like it’s great
Marguerite Orane 9:51
magic you just wonder, watching this magic on for more than, and then it takes up in a life of its own, and it says is amazing.
Despina Zanganas 10:02
Yeah, yeah, absolutely, it’s, it’s, it’s, it’s a high like you said, Yeah, you’re like, I get that I’ve met people and we’re gonna work through and it’s, it’s so exciting. So you’re originally from Jamaica. Do you think that Jamaicans network differently than we do here in North America.
Marguerite Orane 10:21
Yes, so I moved to Canada in 2009, so most of my career has was spent in Jamaica and networking in Jamaica, I think is less formal, and less scripted. And we network, it’s a smaller society clearly so I want to say everybody knows everybody. I mean, you’re never more than one degree of separation away from someone you want to eat right, it’s really easy just to connect with people. So, you do not have to be as as as formal as I find we are in, in Canada, they’re also, There is more mixing socially you know Jamaicans are very social without the party. Yeah, miss, guess what, you know your boats are party effect or something, and you’re gonna see clients, you’re gonna see people who you’d like to be clients and they’re right they’re having a good time and you have a good time with them and then it becomes a little party last night, coffee or chat or something like that so. So yeah, that there are differences for sure, but we need to work,
Despina Zanganas 11:37
right, so there’s no like scripted necessarily like this is a networking event like there is here
Marguerite Orane 11:43
a lot of networking in Jamaica, the formal part happens in service stores service clubs are very, very active, you know rotary and optimist and kiwannis. So a lot of the form of networking, although they will say oh no we’re not into networking, this is about service but come on, you know what networking is all about. The other thing is very big in Jamaica, which really just drives me up a wall because it’s a boys club a men’s only club is the large, A lot of men belong to these lodges that are men only these secret societies and, you know, they, are they take care of each other so a lot of networking, goes on there as well. And then a lot of networking was on the golf course. Right. Yeah, woman played on, but, you know, like Wednesday afternoon when I lived in Jamaica My, my, my home in Jamaica border, one of the golf courses in Kingston, and I could just go down to the back end, I think it was the 16th hole or something and I don’t see clients and people come over, I mean, you know, so, but I didn’t.
Despina Zanganas 13:06
Again, same here. How about women are there any, is it harder for women in Jamaica we do say to
Marguerite Orane 13:14
never, I think it is. You know the thing about the boys clubs, difficult. Now, interestingly, Jamaica, is number one in the world in terms of countries where you’re most likely to have a female boss. Really. Yes, I did not know that. Absolutely, so it’s very normal to see women in positions of authority. I mean we still have some challenges like if you look at corporate boards, you’re like, Well, we’re all human, but when we’re getting there. I think there is So, honestly, I mean I just have to be frank to hear a friend here, you, you have to be careful where your network, like, a whole, you know, like in Jamaica. I don’t want to dip. I do breakfasts and lunches I don’t do dinner because I didn’t want to be construed that we’re on a date. Yeah, type of thing I try to be very careful. I don’t know if that’s just for Jamaica,
would say,
Despina Zanganas 14:26
I would say it’s the same here, like yeah it’s probably really good to have. I actually love breakfast meetings and that was one of the things that Judy taught me, you know, because then you’re really focused with it, especially with senior level people right like, that’s when they actually have time whereas if you have lunch with somebody or a coffee, there’s probably somebody calling them from the office or something like that. And there’s a specific place on King Street that I used to go I forget the name of it, but there’s always professionals there everybody’s in the suit at like seven or eight o’clock in the morning, just networking and having like really focused meetings and I think that’s actually a really great point if you want to connect with, like, more senior level people. That’s a really good time to do that networking and connecting. So I used to be, I was dragged kicking and screaming like, you know, by duty, those early times, but once I realized the benefit. I absolutely loved it and it became a morning person because
Marguerite Orane 15:34
I do too. I really I really enjoy practice meeting so yes, I think also too, because as you know, they still, despite all these women bosses, it’s still pretty much run by women. And, and women. Yes, we’re women bosses, but we still undertake most of the home care. So when a woman is finished at work, she hasn’t got time to go out to play, or, you know, go and hang out with the guys and have a drink, she gets to Walmart type of thing and that’s a reality just it’s just don’t. We have a second job or another job, I don’t want to call home care and parenting and everything a second job, it’s another job. So I think that, in that case, there we are at a disadvantage.
Despina Zanganas 16:30
And that’s why it’s maybe good to take advantage of like social media when it comes to networking and stuff like that, right, because you can post and connect people on LinkedIn and it really is opened up a different avenue for a lot of people to network. Yeah, you actually that brings me to my next question Do you think that networking is different than it was like 20 years ago, for example.
Marguerite Orane 16:56
Oh, absolutely 10 years ago we didn’t have all of this social media. Yeah, so it was highly dependent on face to face meetings and phone calls. You know you can network from friends or people that you get to know very well in social media and you never meet them. You never, ever meet them face to face, so it’s definitely a lot different easier in some ways, but also harder because it’s not as personal I found. So, what definitely different. Also, I think there’s a lot more pressure to network, right, you go on LinkedIn and LinkedIn are about building your network. And they’re always, you know people popping up. Oh, I’d love to connect with you, you know, would you like to build your network, no I just like ignore no I’m not interested anymore. They’re all of these people doing webinars about, to, to network picked up to become a better network. All of this pressure on us to be better network is to grow our business with networking and, And that wasn’t there 20 years ago.
Despina Zanganas 18:19
Where do you find is the best place for you to network, like in person obviously you know we’re, we’re in COVID right now. But before COVID times, where would you network and where was it successful for you.
Marguerite Orane 18:33
Um, so LinkedIn has been very important and that’s one of the places that to be as dragged me kicking.
I like Jimmy I hate LinkedIn scissor, you got to do it. So I was really happy to tell her the other day I think you know what Judy.
I really love LinkedIn, that that’s important, but you know one of the, one of the ways I’m gonna go back to when I was 23 year old 23 years old and my family is in Jamaica. And I think there’s a lot to be said for this way of networking. So I take no more running business from my brother, my older brother didn’t know anything about managing anything I did, I was just like six months old on university I was so totally unprepared. But one thing he said to me that stuck with me and I found very useful, he says, go and join the industry associations that are always looking for people to do work. And it’s true. So I went and I joined, and got active, and when I said I got active I actually, you know, met with the president I offered myself up to sit down and copy DNS, that kind of thing and I ended up being in short order on the board of directors of the Jamaica exporters Association, and on the board of directors of the Jamaica Manufacturers Association. And those any. Those are huge in terms of networking because here was I 23 years old, and I was sitting around the table with these 5060 year old business Titans. And I was learning so much, but it also meant that I could just pick up the phone and call them, and I was right there. And they got to know me so I think we don’t remember how important good old things like joining associations, look at lean in. Another great place to get active, right. But join the industry associations you learn a lot. Also join associations that involve your clients. So become an associate member for example so when I am again in Jamaica. I became an associate member of the Caribbean association of indigenous banks that is Caribbean wide, and was great, because he had gone to their conference, and there they all learn I volunteered to do presentations to them, because I don’t like networking. I would do presentations and they’d come up to me up and they would know CPL well I love your presentation and so on and so forth. So,
Despina Zanganas 21:36
that I think is really a really really powerful and I’ve worked for me, so greatly to get in the door. You know it’s sitting on boards and being part of associations is amazing. Like I remember looking at your LinkedIn you’ve also been on the board of grace graces and read through, which is the beer in Jamaica, like that is so cool.
Marguerite Orane 22:01
You know what, I’ll tell you a secret with that one. I was so popular with my brother in law because their board directors remuneration worse, these cases. Gonna ask me a beer do you want to.
Despina Zanganas 22:28
Well, yeah, that’s the thing, it opened so many doors for you right. You just and start young like you started at 23. That’s amazing that you were able to get on board so quickly,
Marguerite Orane 22:40
not really because you know what it is so true. You just need it from words working with associations on organizing always building people who want to do the work, right, they’re always so even if you don’t get on the board, get volunteer for a committee there, they always need people to roll up their sleeves and get some work done while you’re getting the work done your networking. Uh huh,
Despina Zanganas 23:06
yeah I can tell you that has been my biggest source of clients and to so many different connections, was through volunteer work, it wasn’t through actually starting my business I mean I’ve gotten business from those volunteer opportunities so I 100% agree I think that’s the best way to tonight, one of the best ways to network for sure. You know, you talk about how you retry kicking and screaming. You know for for those people who have a harder time, what would you prefer Ben, how would you say how do you get more comfortable with, with networking
Marguerite Orane 23:51
and guess the turning point with me so remember no I’m coming from Jamaica where everybody knew Marguerite because, you know, and I was well known and I was connected and I’m in Canada and
Despina Zanganas 24:06
you knew nobody.
Marguerite Orane 24:07
I know very few I knew a few people I knew right I actually will have one or two really good contacts so yeah, I started with them so you, you know to start where you are with who you know. Right, and just start with clear on, you know what it is you’re asking him, very importantly, what you can give. So, my turning point though, because while I was doing that in the early days and I was going to be in meetings at seven o’clock in the morning and I needed them. And, and I’m not knocking again I think it’s brilliant, and wants people to sleep for me and I think that’s very important to get comfortable with what you’re comfortable with. And so, I really just decided, you know, my network is going to be around joy. I am only going to be linked up with people that are interesting, that I want to be evidencing friends with, but
that’s okay.
But interesting people on, on LinkedIn, I’m like wow I you know I love. You’re doing such interesting work. And whenever I accept a connection request on LinkedIn, I am gone to your profile. Yeah, I don’t do it lightly I’ve gone through your profile I’m like yeah this is someone I really want to be connected with. So, so I think that just getting comfortable with the idea that I’m not out there, not out there to get something I’m not here to just give to create a joyful connection. It may or may not result in anything tangible may not be a new plant but you know what, when we connect Dishonored joy. And, and so sometimes so I never put a time limit on my connections, right. I tell you one example. So I met this particular Lady Diana up here, very successful business person, for the life of me I cannot remember how we met, but it was a long time ago, may have been a networking event right. Anyway, well we can’t we just, I liked her, she liked me. And you know we call or two and she, she was really nice and we just smoking. We’ll get to that back anyway. I got a referral from someone, a friend, she referred me to someone, pretty much company here who needed a coach. So I spoke to the person I realize, you know this, I’m not the right coach for this, but I know who he is. So I linked her with Diane. And so, Diane got the contract I think it was something pretty lucrative. She was very thankful to lunch at this wonderful restaurant. And so we’ve just stayed connected throughout the years, and you know, we have always just had it in the back of our veins that we’re going to work together one day and she called me earlier this year, and she asked me to collaborate with her on a particular project I’m like sure, Diane, I mean we and we agree, You know, we’ve always wanted to work together. And so that relationship has been maybe, I don’t know 767 years, sort of in the making but there was no expectation around, it was just, we really like each other, we’re respecting each other for, And maybe we’re gonna help each other if we can, and maybe one day we’ll work together. And it’s just enjoy.
Despina Zanganas 28:02
Yeah, you know, there’s a couple things that you said there first of all it’s just connecting with people that make you feel joyful, because there’s people that I’ve connected with them like I don’t really see the connection and stuff like that and I’ve connected with them. And it wasn’t really. Yeah, I didn’t, I didn’t feel joy but there are certain people that you instantly like, you just want to be around them and you just love their energy, and sometimes you try to force it with people because you think that they’ve got a great resume or they’ve got you know great things, you know about them. And maybe it’s not, it’s not the right thing, it’s not the right thing for you because it’s not going to bring you joy. The other thing is letting things take their time, you know like a lot of people I think they think that they go to one networking event, or meet a person business will come up and you know the make tons of money, but sometimes that can actually take a lot of time.
Marguerite Orane 29:01
One of, one of my mentors, I’m actually in her program Dorie Clark. She’s just written her book is coming out, being launched on the 24th of September the long game and I highly recommend it, it’s about just playing the long game to get results. And she so i i pre read the book there’s a pre launch offer. And one of the things she said just really struck me, she said, or someone that she interviewed in a book said, you know, don’t, don’t ask for anything from a connection. Yeah, within the first year. Wow. Yeah.
Yeah. Spend the time building the relationship, how can I help you. Here’s an article I think you might like. Whatever it is, ask for anything for a year like whoa. Interesting.
Despina Zanganas 30:09
It is, it is interesting, but I mean it makes sense, you know, it’s more offer to give of yourself, as opposed to asking so yeah. That totally makes sense that’s what networking is all about really
Marguerite Orane 30:22
giving it time really allows you to see if this is a person that you do want in your network.
Despina Zanganas 30:31
So you talk about Diane, do you have another favorite networking story or do you have a great experience something that happened to you that you want to share with us.
Marguerite Orane 30:43
Oh. So, I think I want to share this just a spree story of all the exponential benefits of networking. So when I moved to Canada. Somebody said, I don’t remember you, I’ve got to meet Dorothy. She’s from Jamaica, she came here a few years ago. So I met Dorothy, and we kicked lovers, is a good friend. And she said, You know, I’m a member of coffee. That’s the Canadian Association, right, right, entrepreneurs and so on. And he invited me to their breakfast so I went to the breakfast. And then she said, You have to be shooting. And that’s where I met 2d, actually, was, you know, you have to come to it so the chocolate workshop and so on and so we started, you know, working together, where the network, the story just gets really wonderful some carrot is in business, you know I’m building my professional network. But when I sit Judy has introduced me to two people who have done so much for me in terms of my, my wealth. And she introduced me to the absolute best Realtor in the world I swear, she is so wonderful, Helga. I’ll give her a shout.
See,
found me, my dream home. Yeah, and not but not only did she find in a dream home. We had so much fun together in fact we were laughing when actually it was a signal, she’s like, Oh, Miss Nutter little Sunday jobs to go and so that was one, and then she also introduced me to a wonderful financial advisor who has worked real magic with my money. Exactly and dance. And I think the experience that just reminds you that when you start out. I started out with, you gotta meet Dorothy, and look at where it ended up so far, You just never know there’s an exponential effect around networking, and it’s always good to just step back every now and then and say, Oh, how did I get here all the steps so I think that’s really just as sort of a stepping stone, a lane of contacts and networks that has brought me wonderful wonderful joy.
Despina Zanganas 33:40
Well I think that that’s so interesting, you know, because it’s not, it’s not a direct line, there’s like all these branches, you know, it’s like a little tree that grows from all of these connections and you know how go might introduce you to somebody and exactly might introduce you to somebody, you know, and it just, it becomes so much more rich. When you connect all these people and maybe there is somebody in that line that didn’t connect you to anybody but that’s okay like you can connect them to somebody else right. Are there any pet peeve that you have when it comes to networking.
Marguerite Orane 34:18
Well, other than the people who bother me because they want it to join their network for some big reason because of what I can do for them. I see some of the, some people sending some requests, I’d love to be a part of my network and buy this and PLEASE NO NO NO NO NO NO so that that, that really bothers me. The. The other thing is this insistence that you must network a certain way and there’s a certain process that you must follow you need to hear something for us so the conventional wisdom. I think in many ways, networking is an art. There’s an art to network, yes, you might have a process but there’s, There’s also art, and heart in networking and I think we don’t talk enough about the heart side of it, you know like, I mean, do I connect with you this you know if when I met you I didn’t like you. I’m like, Well, tell me this Nina right
leaning group right yeah we connected so there’s a heart, and I think we don’t pay enough attention to the heart side of it and and that’s of course where the giving comes from. I think also there is pressure, particularly on people in the early stages of the career, want to use networking to find a job. There is a lot of pressure to conform. And then if you conform you don’t stand out. Yeah, and also, you don’t feel good because you’re not being yourself. So, that’s my pet peeve
Oh,
you know, so I look at one of the things on LinkedIn. I will always see in people’s profiles, is something to the effect of, you know, professional, in its work recognized professional, and so on and it’s a theme, right. This theme description just changing the words No, be yourself. I don’t even say stand up just just being your normal, natural self. So that was something I had to come to terms with when I moved to Canada. Here I am a short five feet back woman with locks down to my waist, with a high one MB. What, but I use those things to stand out so if you see me at a networking event I am not going to be in a black suit, I don’t own a black suit, I don’t own a suit anymore. I am in the brightest colors that you can see, because you like bright colors, I want to be myself. And if you cannot accept me in some recruits I cannot accept you as who you are. Do you really want to be in that organization. So the pressure to conform and I’m not saying you’re out there as a wild pad. I’m just saying, make sure that you just remain true to who you are.
Despina Zanganas 37:43
And it’s worked for you, right, like he is very successful so I mean that’s a testament to being yourself is so important and I think, you know, the older you get, the more you see how important it is to be yourself. Yeah, it brings you joy, right like it makes you feel authentic so you know that totally, that totally speaks to me. So, this is a question I asked all of my guests. Is there anyone out there that you’ve always wanted to meet. So the reason I asked this is because this is a podcast all about networking. So I want to see if there’s anybody out there that maybe can connect you with this particular person that you’ve always wanted to meet.
Marguerite Orane 38:31
Yeah, I guess. So I’ve met some amazing people in really, really amazing people, because an iPhone I love to play the Six Degrees of Separation Game and I’ve had never ever got to 60 degrees it’s always somewhere around three or four. And I won’t lie, especially if you go to Harvard. You can, you can meet people. Yeah. But I think there are two people that I would really love to meet one is certain brands. Yeah, and the other is a Dalai Lama. Oh wow, yeah. No, when you ask me, you know, who has meant to me, then the next why I pause is because I like to see some struct so one of the fun things I do sometimes, you know, Mind Mind Games of itself is to say, Well, what question would I ask certain brands to start off a conversation that, that he would find interesting. Oh, I’d love to hear that. Or the Dalai Lama, you know, I think I just want to have the Dalai Lama. But just, I did attend a talk, but he did in Toronto, and it was at Rogers Center and he his aura presence is so massive that just felt the peace in the entire Rogers Center.
Despina Zanganas
I can imagine. Yeah, it was amazing. So, before we end the show, I’d like to answer a question from some of our listeners. Sure. So, you know, listeners, if there’s anything that you have question that you have for one of our guests about networking please message me and then we’ll, we’ll hopefully get it on the show, but this one’s from Jennifer so I’ve been working from home since the pandemic started, and I’ve been finding it really difficult to connect with my colleagues. So how do we ensure we continued the joy that we found, when we’re around one another, I mean this goes back exactly to what you do.
Marguerite Orane
Yeah. Boy, work from home. And then the whole pandemic has really changed not just our networking but just the way we interact with each other. One of the things we need to be aware of is that we’re human beings have five senses by physical senses, and we use all of them when we’re face to face interactions but when we’re online with each other, we’re basically using tool using sight and hearing sound. And, and so we’re limited in terms of the sort of more kinesthetic and the smells and so on. So that’s a limitation. So Jennifer, what I’d say to you is the first thing is that you need to make sure that you turn off joyful. When the pandemic started. Now I’ve worked on hold for about 20 years so, but I wasn’t able to travel I’ve been traveled for a year and a half, right, when the pandemic started, and of course my clients were reeling and everything was topsy turvy, all of a sudden I realize, whoa, I have time in the morning, so I doubled down on my morning routine. And it was wonderful. It was the most grounding thing ever. So I highly recommend by all means, do your morning routine. Take care of body, mind and spirit, you know, exercise, get your body moving, get positive thoughts into your head, read, and then just sit quietly and reflect for a while, pray or meditate or whatever to set you do, what are you doing that. When you do that, you start to put yourself in a place of joy, so that you turn up joyful. And I think if you turn on, joy, joy for your one half of the relationship, chances are the other person is going to respond or spend some of your energy and your, your energy, yeah exactly. The other thing that I’ve actually been doing and recommending to clients is to have some time at the beginning of a call to, to just chat to connect. Think about it, when we’re face to face. This is what we’re missing the informal banter, we would be popping into someone’s office, the aha moment or you go to a meeting room and you’re sitting down and you’re chatting until everybody gathers, that doesn’t hide anymore, I’m assuming, or whatever use. So, I always make sure to log on early and I know obviously I spend a few minutes just greeting people saying hi how are you doing, we’ll talk about the weather, talk about COVID Are things happening. I’ve even done in workshops where I just put people straight into breakout rooms in small groups and so just, just find out how you’re doing. And so I think that helps you to connect to keep that connection. And then I think Jennifer connect at the level of feelings, really find out how the other person is feeling, and also share your own feelings, how are you doing and really this before you get into any formalities just, you know what’s happening. And an allied to that is gratitude. You know, thank the person for being there, thank the person for being who they are. Just get into a place of gratitude. Gratitude is a great way to get into joy. You cannot be. If you’re grateful you are on your way to joy. It’s hard to separate the two. So, so I think you just want to develop that connection, heart to heart and keep it going, but you have to start. Got to do the work,
Despina Zanganas
you know, that’s such great advice, you know, I agree with you when we go into these zoom meetings, it’s immediately like let’s go get down to business. We don’t actually connect with these people and that’s really been what we’ve been missing and it’s so unfortunate. Right. I never really thought about that we don’t have the opportunity like pre meetings when you join up in the boardroom and like, you talk about your vacation or your kids baseball game or something like that we used to always do that before the meeting so we haven’t had that chance to connect so that’s really interesting. It doesn’t, you don’t have that joy when you’re just jumping off,
Marguerite Orane
so So that’s phase so if your meeting starts at 10. You know you’re not going to start the business of the meeting until like 10 people chatting, Oh, some some birthdays today well let’s see Happy Birthday, whatever it is just easy. Easy, easy. Yeah.
Despina Zanganas
Brilliant. Yeah, for sure. So, Marguerite, that brings us to the end I just thank you so much for being here, you know, I absolutely love the energy that you bring, you know, this whole podcast I was smiling just like, what do you get your smile and enjoy the conversation that we’ve had so I just want to thank you so much for agreeing to be on the show and it was really a pleasure to have you.
Marguerite Orane
Oh, it’s nice to see you and to your listeners as well, just, just make sure to take care of your own joy and thanks for my Great, thank you so much.
Thanks for tuning in to Connect and Bloom — a podcast that empowers women to master the art of networking and make life-changing connections. Got a burning question about networking? Share it below, or shoot me an email at despina@connectandbloom.com If you want to explore this topic further, head on over to the Connect and Bloom website, follow me on Instagram or Facebook, or — if you haven’t already — subscribe to this podcast. Be sure to connect ~ and bloom ~ with me again in our next episode!
Books and Links mentioned in this episode
Marguerite’s Links
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/margueriteorane
Website: https://margueriteorane.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marguerite.orane
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/joyenabler
Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/margueriteorane
Twitter: https://twitter.com/MargueriteOrane
Joy at Work – is it possible and how can we get it?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9NYHuAVwLJI&t=1s
Marguerite’s Book
Forget It; What’s The Point?: Letting Go and Claiming Joy
by Marguerite Orane
Free and Laughing: Spiritual Insights in Everyday Moments
by Marguerite Orane
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